The plane truth

So there I am, back in 27H in a narrow body (and I mean the plane, not me...I'm a wide body all the way, baby). The 787 Dreamliner is a 3-3-3 configuration in coach and the only real dreaming is in the name. They called for boarding at 12:05 so I only had about 40 minutes at the gate to type up my thoughts and it was already time to queue up. They started calling for boarding for families with small children, people who need extra help and anyone else. No loudspeaker, just a woman projecting her voice admirably. No one moved to the line so I wandered over and she processed me though. Yes, this means that I will have longer on the plane, but this way I can be assured of a space in the overhead bin.

While settling in, a couple of students approach me and I work on their essays with them. What else am I doing? The women in the row in front of me enjoy watching. One tells me that in college she was a history major. Soon after, I hear her discuss world flags with her friend and she makes a comment about the "white flag of peace." I'm pretty sure that that isn't how that works, not even a little.

The flight does not seem sold out and I watch as people get ready to have empty seats next to them. The prospect makes me happy -- no one has shown up to sit in the two seats next to me and I would love to be able to spread out a bit. There is an announcement that the doors are closing...the air staff is closing all the over head bins and we're...hold up, what's this? Last minute arrivals who end up being, that's right, the exact same couple who sat next to me on the way TO Israel and they have the seats next to me. Again.

Hurray.

I'm jealous of the guy who has 3 all to himself and spends 11 hours fast asleep, lying down. I'm jealous of the people who have an empty seat in the middle and can store extra stuff there while they eat. I know I have no reason to expect the empty space and I didn't pay for extra space but why the heck can't I be the lucky one who gets the extra space? It would have been nice.

An hour in, dinner is served (meatballs, couscous, chummus, a roll, salad and cake). After not having had a chance to eat anything for house, I make the mistake of eating it and then tried to fall asleep sitting in my seat. I did get a little rest but did you know you can wake up horribly nauseous already? You can. I make several trips to the little idiots' room and finally fall back to sleep, sort of. Blanket on my head, body contorted to try and relieve pressure on my every so dainty derriere, sleep came fitfully when at all. At some point I gave up and started watching "Mortal Kombat" which was a muddled mess and I hesitate to call it a movie -- it was more an extended advertisement for low grade crap. I stopped in middle to try and rest. The only movies worth watching were ones I had seen before so after I finished the "movie" I switched to music. They have a bizarre and eclectic collection of songs in a variety of playlists so I worked at picking and choosing songs from here and there and that kept me busy.

I try to sleep again and it doesn't come easily to me. It might be that it is time to accept that I'm a little older and need to accept my own limitations. My next trip might require budgeting for seats that afford me a little more space. I fill out the customs form and we land right on time. There is a slight delay as we taxi and get moved a few meters back to line up with the door. I try to head out quickly and make my way to passport control (which goes really quickly -- I have my papers ready and don't seem the difficult type so I get waved through and hear only the most cursory questions. I'm innocuous! I think they take my picture also. Zoom, zoom.

Then I hear the announcement -- our baggage is coming out on carousel 6, but oversized baggage is in the area behind carousel 1, at the opposite end of the terminal. Time to be in 2 places at once. I opt for over sized and wander over there to wait. A few pieces come out from the mystery elevator, and then the skis. I sling them over my shoulder and trip all over myself getting to the carousel 6 area. I needn't have rushed. My luggage was the second to last piece to come out. Of course. Finally, I balance everything (backpack, carry on that I drag, big luggage and skis (and helmet)) and move slowly tot he taxi line. From there, a drive home and then off to work.

So there you have it. A spiritually and gustatorily fulfilling experience. Family, food and then more of each. Repeat as necessary and this was necessary. Thanks for coming along on the ride.