I miss my kids.
That's not huge news to anyone but it points to a serious change in my character. I used to be a rock, an absolute tough guy. I could scoff at emotionality and sentimentality and while I liked kids, I could do with out them. I won't say when it changed but it changed; I know exactly when and why but I don't want to talk about it. Stop asking...geeez. And it continues to change.
As my kids get older I miss them more and more. Sure they were cute as babies, but dirty diapers put a damper on the whole "I like to spend time with you" thing. Now, as we near the time when the dirty diapers are more likely to be mine, I miss them and worry about them constantly. I want to hang out with them as they suddenly don't want to be seen with me. I used to be cool to them and now I'm a curiosity at best and a liability most often. My value is in the money in my pocket and my driver's license. They need me less and I feel it more. I also become wiser and more aware of the threats in that big bad world. How can they ever deal with the stuff I am ready to deal with? They are just kids! And as they stop being kids, it is important to remember, THEY WILL ALWAYS BE KIDS!
Hey, world. These are my babies. I still want to cuddle them and protect them. I still want to make sure they are sleeping well, and enjoying a warm sunbeam. I want them to succeed and appreciate their worlds without having to hurt. So be nice to them. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
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