A sordid post

 Here's a nice mix of crazy thoughts that have been in my head over the last couple of days. Sift through them and you'll find something for everyone. Except you. Sorry. Cuts had to be made.

1. An Affirmation -- I like to remind others that this career attracts the outsiders, the "nerds" and the emotionally stunted. I tell them that teaching is a noble career for erstwhile losers and that we are all trying to improve the world one kid at a time. I mean, except me. I was always cool and am doing this for the money and fame. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRUYCR8Vn3k

2. A realization -- I don't like how you have to accomplish something to be recognized for your accomplishments

3. A musical interlude -- Marshall Crenshaw sang "There she goes again" and his song opens with a little melody which reminds me very strongly of the first three notes in the vocal line of "There she goes" by Sixpence None the Richer. Could someone check on that, please?

4. A Word -- I don't know if I have ever heard the word "escapability" but on Sunday, I heard it on both an NFL broadcast and an NHL broadcast. Linguistic conspiracy!

5. A movie idea -- and this is not the same as the recent Awkwafina movie "Jackpot." In my film, the organization running the lottery hires a "cleaner." You know those tickets that have someone win $X every week (or month or year) for life? This guy goes around killing them to save the company money.

6. About my faith -- I believe that cars are more than just the sum of their parts. There is something "soulful" that makes cars unique and, if not alive then at least "not dead." We love our cars on a variety of levels, including familialy. We talk to them, cajole them, berate them, bargain with them, thank them and remind them how awesome they are. They have personalities.

7. A self dialogue:

Me -- I'm such a failure! I can't even win the lottery.

Also Me -- uch...so gross

Me -- what?

Also Me -- Why do you think you should even deserve to win the lottery? Aren't there people who are really struggling and who should win before you? Like I said...gross.

Me -- No -- I, I was just trying to create a metaphor to express my lack of luck in my whole life as epitomized by this particular failure.

Also Me -- so you are labelling the billions of people who have not won the lottery as "failures"? Even Grosser.

this is why I try not to engage myself in dialogue.

8. Alton Brown looks like Robin Wilson. There, I said it. I have looked up pictures. I'm right. Deal with it.

9. Sometimes I get confused between "Wild Child" by the Black Keys and "Dark Star" by CSN.

10. Another Word -- I never see or hear the word "rabbit" as a verb (to run away) except in "The Avengers" (Coulson's death scene). Today, I read a Jonathan Kellerman book (Cold Heart) which used it 3 times and then I turned on an episode of Adam-12 (season 2, episode 5) and the word was used!

11. A hard truth -- When it comes down to it, any polite declining of an offered place to stay for the night is ultimately sourced in my distrust of all and my fear that I will be kidnapped, imprisoned, murdered and eaten or otherwise victimized while at your place.

12. I was watching the Jets game. The commentator said, "The Jets have had a very methodic drive." I heard the grammatical mistake but felt helpless. I yelled at the TV but he didn't hear me! But I watched the closed captioning and it read "a very methodical..." The system, either human or computer generated fixed the grammar. Curious.

13. I saw a commercial for IHOP. They were promoting their "world famous pancake combo." All I could picture was 

14. Here's a loophole -- when you get arrested and they read you your rights, they finish up by asking if you understand these rights as they have been read, and ask if you have any questions. I have questions. Lots of questions. MAN do I have questions. What are they allowed to answer and what have they been trained to explain? If I stump them, do I get to go free?

15. Is there much else that we have to reckon with other than a force?

16. Folk you, etymologies -- The phrase "learning on the fly" developed from the MIT Genetics lab where they do cutting edge experiments and make pioneering discoveries about genes, learning new things while working with drosophila.

17. Just for fun and, please, JUST FOR FUN, I turned the poem by William Carlos Williams into a suicide note

This is just to say

I have eaten

the bullet

that was in

the handgun

and which

you were probably

saving

for later

Forgive me

life is worthless

so sad

and so cold