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buzzzz buzzzz
Two long buzzes. That's the sound my phone makes when it gets a notification that someone has done something of significance on Facebook. I get three shorts for a work email, 2 shorts for an IM or text and 2 medium for an email from another account (I have several...I tried to corner the market on email accounts a few years back. Didn't work out). 5 short, repeating means the phone is ringing. It's like a system I have, only quieter.

So I'm out and about, being all I can be and then some and the phone buzzes two longs. I always wonder what the world of Facebook has to offer so I take out the phone and start pushing the magical buttons to unwrap the amusement.

And there it is. Someone I don't know has added a comment to a status update for someone's post -- a status update I commented on. Maybe that new person has something significant to add, or wants to comment about my statement. This should be fascinating.

"Sweet!"
"LOL"
"Wow!"
"Cool"

That's it? Seriously? I stopped what I was doing, put others at risk as I checked my phone during surgery, placed the prime minister on hold so that I could see you contribute the word "sweet" to the discourse? Have some self-respect people. Don't put yourselves out there because you are lonely and just want to see your name in lights for a brief moment! Put a comment out there because you have something to add. cf Psycho Killer, people!

I believe we all share the responsibility not just to be, but to be interesting to others. Don't make me mock you in public for being insipid. The guy whose status it is should be waiting for affirmation via "Neat!" If he is, he's more pathetic than you, but I know he isn't because I found something of value to respond to. If it was just a stupid status update fishing for people to admire it, I wouldn't have posted anything (this argument does not hold when the status update elicits only mocking from me; in that case, while it is nice to see others get that I was mocking, lifeless comments simply cement the vapidity of the original status update and that reminds me of my superiority).

There are rules, people.