Making the right call

I have been accumulating more info and have worked on a complex conspiracy theory regarding the NFL. You can look back to my previous posts about the charge that the league is more footbal-esque entertainment, with some sort of either scripting or pre-recording going on than it is a real league of honest to goodness sports competitiousness and in this post I'm going to lay more details out for you.

Here's an opening point -- I find that it is impossible for the guys in the booth to have spotted, analyzed, annotated, researched and prepped the in-depth analysis which they present so quickly after each and every play. Any viewer would have to watch a play repeatedly and possibly in slow-motion to see the movement of multiple players, and crucial block or the critical slip but these guys have already called out the player and instantly had the playback at the ready so that they can confidently draw up exactly what happened because a camera happened to be focused on the correct player (out of 40+ on the field) who does something noteworthy. That point of view is already spliced and cued up, ready for replay. No one has to ask for a specific angle or shot, player or move. Somehow the guy in the booth and the guys in the editing truck are in complete simpatico and can read each other's thoughts. Not buying it. Go, watch a game and see if you can see, come to conclusions about, and have the exact angle ready in a matter of 3-5 seconds after the play's completion. Not gonna happen. Just saying.

Next, I'll relay a recent incident. In addition to the gaffes which I have catalogued and presented, there's this -- I was watching Thursday Night Football last week and the play-by-play guy who might have been Al Michaels said that there was a flag on a particular play. On the screen, the little "Flag" yellow marker went up. His co-host (or the color commentator...I don't know the PC term for it anymore) started anticipating a penalty call on a specific player which would negate a 78 yard run back for a touchdown. He started to explain who committed the foul and on and on. Then the game went to commercial. When it returned to "live" coverage, the extra point was being kicked. Al Michaels said, "Well, apparently we had no penalty." Clearly, someone was off the page in terms of what was supposed to be happening. The experts were already dissecting a penalty, the graphic indicated a penalty but there was none on the field. Hmmm. Something problematic about that.

[side funny thought: I envision a cartoon which shows a football player severely bloody and cut up, looking at the ref and yelling "You're flagging ME? For HOLDING?" and opposite him, in the uniform of his competitor is Edward Scissorhands.]

So here's what I have decided: the NFL is an expression of a coup d'état orchestrated by the industrial-military complex in cahoots with the league.

**Sinister and melodramatic interlude

they're outside right now. A dog is barking in the empty hallway as footsteps die. The silence which is somehow not silence echoing, holding the memory of noise and the promise of the unknown. The NFL has found me.

** end sinister and melodramatic interlude

I noticed while watching a game on Monday Night Football that all the coaches on both sides (!) were wearing identical brown coats and camouflage hats. Now, sure, you'll probably say something about how that makes sense because of Veterans' Day recently and you'll reassure me that the outfit will be gone by this coming Sunday but that misses the point! The league is testing out the outfit to see if America responds to it. The goal is to drive us into a state of war with anyone and everyone. We have to accept the military as essential and wish to adopt their clothing style as a show of mass acceding. And I think that Vegas knows all this and works it into the calculation of odds for any game. This is all why reviewing a call has been such a big deal and why some plays and calls are non-reviewable. 

The problem is that, recently, the calls have become more and more obviously at odds with reality. More and more booth guys are questioning calls which undermines the authority which the officials need in order to skew a game in one direction or another. I expect that in the upcoming weeks, refs will take a small step back and "let them play" and guys in the booth will second guess less often, so that the league can ensure its continuing storylines.

And if anythig happens to me, it was the NFL. They're everywhere.

That led to an important realization on my part: on every play, ten out of the eleven players on each side do something which can be construed as guilty in terms of penalty-liable offenses. On any given play, you can probably find SOMETHIG in the actions of almost every player that COULD be flagged. On practically every play, every lineman on either side of the ball holds his counterpart in some way. There is always contact between member of the secondary and a receiver. Somebody on the line always moves before the snap even if the movement is small. The bottom line is that the fix in the game isn't absolute and isn't the clear control leading to a predetermined victor. Instead, the point is to steer the game in a general direction but not with such complete control. This steering happens through the selective work of the officials. The specific script isn't written but there are cues and prompts and a general story arc, shaped by the choices of officials to call or not call a particular offense.